Job Instability
For most of my working life, I've never quite grasped the secret of maintaining a job in the long-term. I have yet to master the soft skills required: small talk, politics, and personality. Perhaps, I am just not meant to live the corporate lifestyle? Or maybe I simply don't want to conform to pre-existing norms. Could it be that introverts have no place in the workforce other than a small corner in an office with minimal interaction with their coworkers?
I've always been taciturn and uncertain about which step to make moving forward. But, I have never lost the will power to continue moving, whether it be two steps forward or one backwards, I continue moving. I try not to harp on these temporary jobs that seem hard to pin down. It is almost as if I have no desire to keep them anyways. Typical of a gypsy soul, right? Are they really worth my time? Is it worth dealing with bosses and supervisors constantly dictating my every move? Maybe these malfunctions are there to serve as a blessing in disguise. They may be the incentive for me to really get creative, and think of another means of survival rather than your typical 9-5.
I've had my fair share or workplace memories, some good, and most just terrible. I can't even begin to detail these instances without my vivid imagination making me cringe every time the memories resurface. I want to say that most of my jobs never made an impact, but in reality they have. I won't forget the times I had to deal with such unprofessional behavior that I forgot I was even at a place called "work". There were many moments where I felt I was back in foster care, getting relentlessly harassed; I felt as though people were out to manipulate and abuse me, over and over. Coworkers that would watch my every move, to ensure that eventually, out of discomfort I would just never return. Why people go these extents to oust their competition is beyond me. I can only say it must be deep rooted and very personal to comprehend. If anyone has the audacity to get someone else that uncomfortable to make them quit or get fired, it goes beyond a personal level. It reaches a very degrading level of humanity and existence to take away the very essence of one's survival and livelihood. Most importantly, many people regard this kind of behavior in the workplace as a normal part of workplace culture in America. How is it possible to live like this? No wonder why our healthcare system is booming. We are just making each other sick, mentally, physically, and most of all, spiritually.
Of the many experiences I've been offered in the workforce, the most notable one was when I worked at an inner city hospital. I vaguely remember working with folks that seemed to have an adverse attitude about Americans born here with innate rights such as U.S. citizenship and English as their native language. It seemed to be a horrific crime to choose to speak my innate language-English. Of course, I knew how to speak Spanish at the time, but it never appealed to me to speak a language that was unfamiliar to me at my workplace, especially to people that I was not at most comfortable with. Most of the time, even when I would on occasion speak Spanish, they would sneer at my accent and my inability to pronounce the words with eloquence like they did. I was not very affected by it at first (I accepted English as my innate language), but overtime, it became a pattern of abuse. They would all speak to me in Spanish, or to each other around my area of work, expecting me to answer in their native language, not mine. They expected me to feel inferior, because I could not speak the language as well as they did, even though I was supposed to, due to my ethnicity. Because I was a citizen by my birth right and they weren't, they felt compelled to seek revenge. Many of these folks had to go through some hardships just to arrive and remain in this country, so I could see where the resentment might spring from, but in no way was it justified. They continued to make my life a living hell, at least they tried to, psychologically. They would always find ways to insinuate that I am "too white" and make mocking remarks and jokes about my ethnicity as a Puerto Rican. One time, they even randomly started criticizing Puerto Rican cuisine, claiming it was super greasy. I was never quite immersed in my own culture growing up due to my suburban upbringing, but I did have a vague understanding that they did not embrace my culture, one that was unfamiliar to me. I figured it was best to ignore, since they clearly had many issues that resulted in that kind of behavior towards me.
I have always been a firm believer in dis-ease encompassing a broader definition than just the physical sense. To me, lack of health can occur on many levels, whether it be a physical or spiritual dimension. But, what is most universal to me is the degradation of one's own sense of humanity. This can occur in many ways, from outright insulting others, harassment, crime, and hate. If you are unable to accept other's differences regardless of the level of envy, jealousy, and distaste you may feel, there is a serious level of dis-ease occurring in your heart. This lack of wellbeing can severely affect us, it can create a void that will cause you to revert to bullying, hate, and disrespect towards humanity. This is where your spirituality gets sacrificed forever. The energy that you create with these negative sentiments will always exist within the universe and will perpetuate alongside your life. Many of them will manifest themselves as common physical ailments that earn a diagnosis; diseases like cancer and diabetes go beyond the physical dimension. Do you want to carry this negative energy with you? Would you be okay suffering the long-term consequences of emotional upheaval by developing chronic diseases? Of course not. So why do many people simply fail to grasp this understanding? It comes down to one simple answer: they are spiritually unwell.
When I reflect on these many adverse experiences, they tend to bring about some faint emotions. Of course they meant to do that, they wanted to emotionally torture me. But, what they were unaware of is that I've been through far worse. I've dealt with some deeper issues from a younger age that made that reality at the hospital just a gentle reminder of the sickness that exists within some of us, our fellow so called human beings. I have been primed from a young age to survive adversity. I was ripped apart from my mother's arms and placed into foreign territory. I lived the patterns of abuse, a cold and insidious form of human degradation. I knew what it was like to not be wanted or liked, even by those that were supposed to care for and protect me at a young and vulnerable age. I have felt the pain of having to let go of my very means of survival, a comfortable home, the stable foundation that any child should have. So to call this workplace my means of survival was a misnomer: it was just a gentle reminder of my childhood. And what happened to me when I was younger dealing with it- I just moved on and grew from it. With any kind of traumatic experience comes some serious strength, but it takes a special person to recognize it, before it subtly consumes them on the inside. It really is all perspective and your thoughts can become a very powerful reality if you let them.
~The greatest wealth is spiritual health; our spiritual, mental, and physical well-being are our true treasures that will guide us through life~
I've always been taciturn and uncertain about which step to make moving forward. But, I have never lost the will power to continue moving, whether it be two steps forward or one backwards, I continue moving. I try not to harp on these temporary jobs that seem hard to pin down. It is almost as if I have no desire to keep them anyways. Typical of a gypsy soul, right? Are they really worth my time? Is it worth dealing with bosses and supervisors constantly dictating my every move? Maybe these malfunctions are there to serve as a blessing in disguise. They may be the incentive for me to really get creative, and think of another means of survival rather than your typical 9-5.
I've had my fair share or workplace memories, some good, and most just terrible. I can't even begin to detail these instances without my vivid imagination making me cringe every time the memories resurface. I want to say that most of my jobs never made an impact, but in reality they have. I won't forget the times I had to deal with such unprofessional behavior that I forgot I was even at a place called "work". There were many moments where I felt I was back in foster care, getting relentlessly harassed; I felt as though people were out to manipulate and abuse me, over and over. Coworkers that would watch my every move, to ensure that eventually, out of discomfort I would just never return. Why people go these extents to oust their competition is beyond me. I can only say it must be deep rooted and very personal to comprehend. If anyone has the audacity to get someone else that uncomfortable to make them quit or get fired, it goes beyond a personal level. It reaches a very degrading level of humanity and existence to take away the very essence of one's survival and livelihood. Most importantly, many people regard this kind of behavior in the workplace as a normal part of workplace culture in America. How is it possible to live like this? No wonder why our healthcare system is booming. We are just making each other sick, mentally, physically, and most of all, spiritually.
Of the many experiences I've been offered in the workforce, the most notable one was when I worked at an inner city hospital. I vaguely remember working with folks that seemed to have an adverse attitude about Americans born here with innate rights such as U.S. citizenship and English as their native language. It seemed to be a horrific crime to choose to speak my innate language-English. Of course, I knew how to speak Spanish at the time, but it never appealed to me to speak a language that was unfamiliar to me at my workplace, especially to people that I was not at most comfortable with. Most of the time, even when I would on occasion speak Spanish, they would sneer at my accent and my inability to pronounce the words with eloquence like they did. I was not very affected by it at first (I accepted English as my innate language), but overtime, it became a pattern of abuse. They would all speak to me in Spanish, or to each other around my area of work, expecting me to answer in their native language, not mine. They expected me to feel inferior, because I could not speak the language as well as they did, even though I was supposed to, due to my ethnicity. Because I was a citizen by my birth right and they weren't, they felt compelled to seek revenge. Many of these folks had to go through some hardships just to arrive and remain in this country, so I could see where the resentment might spring from, but in no way was it justified. They continued to make my life a living hell, at least they tried to, psychologically. They would always find ways to insinuate that I am "too white" and make mocking remarks and jokes about my ethnicity as a Puerto Rican. One time, they even randomly started criticizing Puerto Rican cuisine, claiming it was super greasy. I was never quite immersed in my own culture growing up due to my suburban upbringing, but I did have a vague understanding that they did not embrace my culture, one that was unfamiliar to me. I figured it was best to ignore, since they clearly had many issues that resulted in that kind of behavior towards me.
I have always been a firm believer in dis-ease encompassing a broader definition than just the physical sense. To me, lack of health can occur on many levels, whether it be a physical or spiritual dimension. But, what is most universal to me is the degradation of one's own sense of humanity. This can occur in many ways, from outright insulting others, harassment, crime, and hate. If you are unable to accept other's differences regardless of the level of envy, jealousy, and distaste you may feel, there is a serious level of dis-ease occurring in your heart. This lack of wellbeing can severely affect us, it can create a void that will cause you to revert to bullying, hate, and disrespect towards humanity. This is where your spirituality gets sacrificed forever. The energy that you create with these negative sentiments will always exist within the universe and will perpetuate alongside your life. Many of them will manifest themselves as common physical ailments that earn a diagnosis; diseases like cancer and diabetes go beyond the physical dimension. Do you want to carry this negative energy with you? Would you be okay suffering the long-term consequences of emotional upheaval by developing chronic diseases? Of course not. So why do many people simply fail to grasp this understanding? It comes down to one simple answer: they are spiritually unwell.
When I reflect on these many adverse experiences, they tend to bring about some faint emotions. Of course they meant to do that, they wanted to emotionally torture me. But, what they were unaware of is that I've been through far worse. I've dealt with some deeper issues from a younger age that made that reality at the hospital just a gentle reminder of the sickness that exists within some of us, our fellow so called human beings. I have been primed from a young age to survive adversity. I was ripped apart from my mother's arms and placed into foreign territory. I lived the patterns of abuse, a cold and insidious form of human degradation. I knew what it was like to not be wanted or liked, even by those that were supposed to care for and protect me at a young and vulnerable age. I have felt the pain of having to let go of my very means of survival, a comfortable home, the stable foundation that any child should have. So to call this workplace my means of survival was a misnomer: it was just a gentle reminder of my childhood. And what happened to me when I was younger dealing with it- I just moved on and grew from it. With any kind of traumatic experience comes some serious strength, but it takes a special person to recognize it, before it subtly consumes them on the inside. It really is all perspective and your thoughts can become a very powerful reality if you let them.
~The greatest wealth is spiritual health; our spiritual, mental, and physical well-being are our true treasures that will guide us through life~
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